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Thirty- one hymns to the Star Goddess
XXXI HYMNS
TO THE STAR GODDESS
Who is Not
BY XIII: which is ACHAD
I .?. Invocation
Mother of the Sun, Whose Body is White with the Milk of the Stars, bend upon
Thy servant and impart unto him Thy Secret Kiss!
Enkindle within him the Holy Ecstasy Thou hast promised unto them that love
Thee; the Ecstasy which redeemeth from all pain.
Hast thou not proclaimed: All the sorrows are but shadows, they pass and are
done, but there is that which remains? That the Universe is Pure Joy-that
Thou givest unimaginable Joys on Earth--that Thou demandest naught in
sacrifice?
Let me then rejoice, for therein may I serve Thee most fully. Let it be Thy
Joy to see my joy; even as Thou hast promised in Thy Holy Book!
Now, therefore, am I Joyful in Thy Love.
AUMN
II .?. The Brook
I wandered beside the running stream, and mine eyes caught the glint of Thy
Starry Orbs in the swirling waters.
So is it with my mind; it flows on towards the Great Sea of Understanding
wherein I may come to know Thee more fully.
Sometimes, as it journeys, it threatens to overflow its banks in its eager-
ness to reflect a wider image of Thine Infinite Body.
Ah! How the very stones, over which flow the life of my being, thrill at
the tender caress of Thy reflected Image.
Thou, too, art Matter; it is I---Thy Complement---who am motion! Therefore
these very stones are of Thee, but the Spirit---the Life---is the very Self
of me; mine Inmost Being.
Flow on, O Stream! Flow on, O Life! Towards the Great Sea of Understanding,
the Great Mother.
III .?. The Rose Garden
Long have I lain and waited for Thee in the Rose Garden of Life; yet ever
Thou withholdest Thyself from mine Understanding.
As I lay I contemplated Thy nature as that of an Infinite Rose.
Petals, petals, petals.. but where, O Beauteous One, is Thy Heart?
Hast Thou no Heart? Are Thy petals Infinite so that I may never reach the
Core of Thy Being?
Yet, Thou hast said: "I love you! I yearn to you! Pale or purple, veiled or
voluptuous, I who am all pleasure and purple, and drunkeness of the innermost
sense, desire you: Come unto me!"
Yea! Mine innermost sense is drunken; it is intoxicated upon the Dew of the
Rose. Thy Heart is my Heart; there is no difference, O Beloved.
When I shall have penetrated to the Heart of Thine Infinite Rose, there shall
I find Myself.
But I shall never come to myself---only to Thee.
IV .?. The Fox Glove
Tall and straight as a Fox Glove do I stand before Thee, Mother of Heaven.
The flower of my being is given over to a strange conceit; I grow up towards
the Stars and not towards the Sun.
Art Thou not Mother of the Sun?
Thus have I blasphemed the Lord and Giver of Life for Thy sake. Yet am I not
ashamed, for in forgetting the Sun I am become the Sun--Thy Son--yet a
thousand times more Thy Lover.
The foxes have holes and the birds of the air have nests, but now I have
nowhere to lay my head; for tall and straight as a Fox Glove do I stand
before Thee. My resting place is the Womb of the Stars.
Yet all that I may comprehend of Thine Infinite Body is but as the Glove
upon one of Thy soft sweet hands, touching the Earth, not hurting the little
flowers.
V .?. The Storm
A Dark Night and the Storm. The lightening flashes between Thee and me. I am
dazzled so that I see Thee not.
So in the depths of my being flash the fires of life; they blind me to the
Understanding of Thee and Thine Infinite Body of Stars.
Yet I see Thee reflected in the body of her I love, as we lie with quivering
limbs awaiting the coming of the sound of thunder.
She fears the thunder, and turns within herself for consolation.
But even there the Lightning flameth, for I have loosed the fires of my being
within the dark recess---in honour of the Storm and of Thine Infinite
Body which I see not.
VI .?. The Hole in The Roof
Once I knew an ancient serpent. He delighted to bask in the Sunshine which
penetrated through a tiny hole in the roof of the cave.
He was old and very wise.
He said: "Upon me is concentrated the Light of the whole Universe."
But a little brown beetle, who had long lived in the cave with him, looked
up, and spreading his wings passed out through the hole in roof---into the
Infinite Beyond.
Thus, forsaking wisdom, would I come to Thee, Beloved Lady of the Starry
Heavens.
VII .?. The Design
Strange curves: and every Curve a Number woven into a Musical and Harmonious
Pattern.
Such was the design showed me by my friend when first we met.
It was like an exchange of greetings by means of an inward recognition.
Oh! Could I but grasp the Ever-changing Design of Thy Star Body, Mother of
Heaven!
Yet, it is written: "Every man and every woman is a star. Every number is
infinite, there is no difference."
Such then is Life, for those who love Thee: Strange Curves, and every Curve a
Number woven into a Musical and Harmonious Design.
VIII .?. The Snow Drift
My body was blue as Thine, O Beloved, when they found me. I was stiff as if
held in a close embrace. Nor was I conscious of aught but Thee, till the
small fires of Earth brought me back with an agony of tingling pain.
How came I to be lost in the snow-drift?
I remember how I had taken shelter from the blinding storm. The snow fell
about me, and I waited, turning my thought to Thee.
Then did I realize how every snow-flake is built as a tiny star. I looked
closer, burying my face in the white pile, as in Thy Bosom. Mine arms
embraced the snow-drift; I clung to it in a mad ecstacy.
Thus would I have pressed Thy Body to mine, wert Thou not Infinite and I but
as tiny as a star-flake.
So was my body frozen---as by the utmost cold of inter-stellar space.
It was blue as Thine when they found me locked in Thine embrace.
IX .?. Daylight
In the Daylight I see not Thy Body of Stars, O Beloved.
The little light of the Sun veils the Great Light of the Stars, for to-day
Thou seemest distant.
The Sun burns like a great Torch, and Earth seems as one of His little
Spheres, filled with life.
I am but a tiny spermatozoon, but within me is the fiery and concentrated
essence of Life.
Draw me up into Thyself, O Sun! Project me into the Body of Our Lady Nuit!
Thus shall a new Star be born, and I shall see Thee even in the Daylight, O
Beloved.
X .?. The Bird
Once I bought a little bird; his cage was very small; it had only one perch.
he was so young he had not even learned to sing, but he chirped gladly when I
brought him home.
Then I raised the bars of his cage, and without a moment's hesitation he flew
out into the room, and spying the cage of the love-birds, perched upon it and
examined it carefully.
Not long afterwards another and stronger cage was obtained for the love-
birds, for they had pecked through some of the frail bars. When the little
bird was offered the discarded cage, he quickly hopped from his tiny one to
theirs.
Now he has three perches and room for his tail, and when we open the door of
his cage he refuses to come out. Perhaps he fears to lose what he had once
coveted and then obtained.
Herein lies the secret of Government. Give the people what will make them
reasonably comfortable; let them have three perches and room for their tails;
and forgetting their slavery and restrictions, they will be content.
Hast Thou not said "The slaves shall serve." Lady of the Starry Heaven?
XI .?. The Moral
There is another moral to the story of the little bird. Having gained his
desire for a larger cage, he forgot his longing for Freedom.
The door remained open; the room was before him, wherein he could stretch his
wings and fly.
Yet he preferred his cage.
The wide world might have been his had he known how to use it, but he was not
ready for that; he would have perished of cold had I let him out into the
wintry snow.
Let those who would travel the Mystic Pah remember this: Earth Consciousness
is an illusion and limitation. When it frets us, like a little cage, our
chance for greater freedom comes.
But when a larger cage is offered---when we obtain Dhyana---let us not rest
there thinking ourselves free. The door is open, Samadhi lies beyond, and
beyond that, when we are ready for it, the Real Freedom, Nirvana.
O Lady of the Stars, let me not content till I penetrate the ultimate bars
and am Free---One with the Infinitely Great as with the Infinitely Small.
XII .?. The Invisible Foot Prints
Long have I roamed the Earth delighting in the Good, the Beautiful and the
True; ever seeking the spots where these seem to be most Perfect.
There is joy in this wandering among the flowers of life, but Thy Joy, O
Beloved, is to be desired above all.
Now I seek a resting place, I am set upon a new Quest, to Worship at Thy
feet.
For it is written of Thee: "Bending down, a lambent flame of blue, all
touching, all penetrant, her lovely hands upon the black earth, and her lithe
body arched for love, and her soft feet not hurting the little flowers."
Oh! That I might discover Thine Invisible Footprints upon the Earth and there
come to the Understanding of Thy Being, O Beloved.
XIII .?. The Finger Tips
Or, it may be, O Beloved, I shall discover the imprints of Thy finger tips
amid the flowers or upon the Black Earth.
Hath not Nemo a Garden that he tendeth? Doth he not also labour in the Black
Earth?
Who knoweth when Thy hands may grasp me and draw me up into Thine arms, there
to nestle at Thy breast, to feed upon the Milk of the Stars?
Beloved, verily this tending of the Garden of the World---although the labor
may seem heavy---leadeth to a Great Reward. As Thou hast said: "Certainty,
not faith, while in life upon death, rest, ecstasy." Nor dost Thou demand
aught in sacrifice.
What do the Bhaktis know of Love? They see the Beloved everywhere.
But when I am one with Thee, O Beloved, I shall not see Thee, for I shall
know Theee as Thou art.
XIV .?. The Well of Stars
I know a hidden well of clearest water. Naught but the coping of delicate
pink onyx is visible until the secret spring be touched.
Then beware! For above the entrance hangs a fiery sword.
Few find this Well or know its Secret; there are but two roads leading
thereto.
From the broad Mountain summit we may search the slopes for a vision of the
Woodland Delta where grow the Trees of Eternity, or we may journey through
the Valley between the Ivory Hills---if we fear not the purple shadows and
the black pit-fall.
From Thee we came; to Thee may we return, O Well of Living Stars!
XV .?. The Icicles of Isis
It hath been written how the Old King dreamed of his banished peacock,
entombed in a palace of ice, who cried: "The Icicles of Isis are falling on
my head."
Thus it is with those who are banished to the Palace of the Moon---for the
Word of Sin is Restriction.
Oh! Lady of the Starry Heavens, let me not become frozen at the touch of the
cold Veil of Isis. For the Moon is but the dead reflector of the Sun, and He
but the youngest of Thy Children of Light.
Let me lift Thy Peacock Veil of a Million Starry Eyes, O Beloved!
Show Thy Star Splendour, O Nuit; bid me within Thine house to dwell!
XVI .?. Purple Mill
The delicate purple mist streams up from the hills: I watch and wait for the
meaning of it all.
Sometimes it seems like the incense smoke of Aspiration ascending towards the
Sun---giver of Light, Life, Love and Liberty to the Children of Earth.
But the Sun is going down behind the Mountains, and Thy Starry Lamps glow in
the Sky.
Is not the Lamp above the Altar a symbol of the Desire of the Higher to draw
up the lower to Itself?
So, O Lady of Heaven, I liken the Mist to the life-breath of Souls who pant
for Thee here below.
And I remember Thy words:
Above, the gemmed azure is
The naked splendour of Nuit;
She bends in ecstacy to kiss
The secret ardours of Hadit.
The winged globe, the starry blue,
Are mine, O Ankh-af-na-khonsu!
I, too, would ascend as a delicate purple mist that steams up from the Hills.
Art Thou not all Pleasure and Purple?
XVII .?. The Infinite Within
I would that I were as the feminine counterpart of Thee, O Beloved; then
would I draw the Infinite within.
Yet since Thy Pure Being must ever be more refined than this body of mine I
should interpenetrate every part of Thee with my living flesh.
Thus, O Beloved, should we enter into a new and more complete embrace: not as
of earth wherein the male uniteth with the female by means of the physical
organs of love, but with every atom of my being close pressed to every atom
of Thine---within and without.
Then, O beloved, would I cry unto the Lord of the Primum Mobile to teach me
the Art of the Whirling Motion of Eternity.
Thus, whirling within Thee, our never-ending nuptial feast shall be
celebrated, and a new System of Revolving Orbs be brought to birth.
Ah! the shrill cry of Ecstacy of that Refined Rapture---the Orgasm of the
Infinite Within.
XVIII .?. The Rainbow
As I sat in the shelter of the forest glade, my eye caught the multi-coloured
gleam of diamonds. I looked again; the Sun rays were playing upon the dew
which clung to a little curved twig.
It seemed like a tiny rainbow of promise.
Then, while I watched in wonder, a small grey spider bridged the arch of the
bow with his silken thread.
Ah! My Beloved, thus, too, hath the Spider of Destiny woven his silken rope
from extreme to extreme of the Great Rainbow of Promise.
Fate hath fitted me as an Arrow to the String of Destiny in the bow of the
Sun.
But Whose Hand shall draw that Mighty Bow, O Beloved, and send me upon fleet
wings to my resting place within Thine Heart?
XIX .?. Dropped Dew
As I came from tending the Rose Garden and was about to return to my humble
shelter, my eyes caught the gleam of dropped dew like a tiny trail along the
path.
It was very early; the Sun had not yet re-arisen; the Stars still twinkled
faintly in the sky.
Who could have come before me to the Garden?
I followed the trail of dew, stooping down so that I saw in each crystal drop
the reflection of a tiny star.
Thus came I to my lady's chamber; she it was who carrying roses had left this
silvery thread as a clue to her hiding place.
When I found her, her eyes were closed, as she pressed the fragrant the pink
blossoms to her white breast.
Then did I bury my face in the blossoms and I saw not her eyes when she
opened them in wonder.
Thus, too, would I follow the Star-trail of Dropped Dew, ere the re-arisen
Sun hides Thee from me, O My Beloved!
Thus would I come to Thee and bury my face in Thy Breast amid the Roses of
Heaven.
Nor should I dare to look into Thine eyes, having discovered Thy secret---the
Dew of Love---the Elixir of Life.
XX .?. Twilight
Twilight... and in a few brief moments the Stars will begin to peep. I will
await Thee, here amid the heather, O Beloved.
I wait... no stars appear for a mist has stolen up from the foot of the
mountains.
Thus I waited for a sight of Thy Star Body till the cold damp mist of
suppresed emotion chilled my being and my reason returned.
The woman stood girt with a sword before me. Emotion was overcome by clarity
of perception. Then did I remember Thy words: "The Khabs is in the Khu not
the Khu in the Khabs. Worship then the Khabs and behold my light shed over
ye."
Thus turned I my thoughts within, so that I became concentrated upon the
Khabs---the Star of mine inmost being. Then did Thy Light arise as a halo of
rapture, and I came a little to lie in Thy bosom.
But I offered one particle of dust---and I lost all in that hour.
Such is the Mystery of Her who demandest naught in sacrifice.
The twilight is returned.
XXI .?. The Dog Star
Wisdom hath said: "Be not animal; refine thy rapture! The canst thou bear
more joy!"
I have been like an unleashed hound before Thee, O Beloved. I have striven
towards Thee and Thou seest in me only the Dog Star.
Yet will I not fall into the Pit called Because, there to perish with the
dogs of reason. There is no reason in me; I seek Understanding, O Mother of
Heaven.
Thus, with my face buried in the black earth, do I turn my back upon Thee. I
will refine my rapture.
So Thou mayest behold me as I am, and so Thou shalt Understand at last, O
Beloved; for in reverse Thou readest this DOG aright.
Hast Thou not said: "There is none other?"
XXII .?. Pot-pouri
The roses are falling. This is the night of the full moon whereon the
children of Sin attend the Sacred Circle.
Therein they will sit divided---but not for love's sake---for they know Thee
not---O Beloved. Into the Elements, the fiery, the watery, the airy and the
earthly Signs are they divided when they gather at the Full Moon within the
forest.
I wandered down the deep shadowy glade, there I espied a tiny sachet of pot-
pouri, dropped---maybe---from the streaming girdle of one of the maidens.
Tenderly I raised it. Its pefume is like unto the perfume of her I love. She,
too, perhaps, has heard the call of the moon and is even now on her way to
the secret tryst.
But hast Thou not said: "Let there be no difference made among you between
any one thing and any other thing; for thereby cometh hurt." What matter then
the name of the maiden? What matter the flowers of which it is composed?
Yet dare I not burn this incense unto Thee, O Beloved, because of Thine hair,
the Trees of Eternity.
Oh! Little sachet of pot-pouri, thou hast reminded me of her I love, for the
roses are falling, it is the night of the Full Moon and the children of Sin
gather to attend the Sacred Circle.
XXIII .?. Red Swansdown
It hath been told how Parzival shot and brought down the Swan of Ecstacy as
it winged over the Mountain of the Grail.
But there is within the archives another story, unheard by the ears of men.
From the breast of the Eternal Swan floated one downy feather, steeped in
blood. This did the youngest and least worthy of the Knights hide tenderly in
his bosom till he concealed it within the hard pillow of his lonely couch.
Night after night that holy pillow became softer; sweeter and sweeter were
his dreams. And one night---the night of the crowning of Parzival---he was
granted the Great Vision wherein the Stars became like flecks of Swansdown
upon the Breast of Heaven, each living and throbbing, for they were steeped
in Blood.
Then did every atom of his being become a Star racing joyfully through the
Great Body of the Lady of Heaven. Thus in sweet sleep came he into the Great
Beyond.
Grant unto me Thy Pillow of Blood and Ecstacy, O Beloved!
XXIV .?. Passing Clouds
A dark night: Not a star is visible, but presently the moon shines out
through a rift in the clouds. And I remember, "The sorrows are but shadows,
they pass and are done, but there is that which remains."
Yet is the moon but illusion.
A dull day: but presently the Sun is seen as the clouds are dispelled by His
light.
Is He that which remains?
Night once more: the Sun is lost to sight, only the moon reminds me of His
presence. The clouds scud swiftly across the Sky and disappear.
Thy Star Body is visible, O Beloved; all the sorrows and shadows have passed
and there is that which remains.
When clouds gather, let me never forget Thee, O Beloved!
XXV .?. The Coiled Serpent
Thus have I heard:
The ostrich goeth swiftly; with ease could he outstrip those who covet his
tail-feathers, yet when danger cometh he burieth his head in the sand.
The tortoise moveth slowly and when embarrased he stoppeth, withdrawing into
his own shell; yet he passeth the hare.
The hare sleepeth when he should be swiftly moving; he runneth in his dreams
thinking himself at the goal.
But the Coiled Serpent hath wisdom, for he hideth his tail and it is not
coveted; he raiseth his head and fears not; he moveth slowly like the
tortoise, yet withdraweth not; he nestles close to the hare, darting his
tongue with swiftness, yet falleth not asleep by the wayside.
Would that I had the Wisdom of the Coiled Serpent, O Beloved, for Thou hast
said: "Put on the wings, arouse the coiled splendour within you: come unto
me!"
XXVI .?. Love and Unity
Twenty-six is the numeration of the Inneffable Name, but It concealeth Love
and Unity.
The Four-lettered Name implieth Law, yet it may be divided for love's sake;
for Love is the law.
The Four-lettered Name is that of the elements, but it may be divided for the
chance of Union; for there is Unity therein.
There is but One Substance and One Love and while these be twenty-six they
One through thirteen which is but a half thereof.
Thus do I play with numbers who would rather play with One and that One Love.
For Thou hast said: "There is naught that can unite the divided but love!"
And is not Achad Ahebah?
XXVII .?. The Riddle
What is that which cometh to a point yet goeth in a circle?
This, O Beloved, is a dark saying, but Thou hast said: "My colour is black to
the blind, but the blue and gold are seem of the seeing. Also I have a secret
glory for them that love me."
And Hadit hath declared: "There is a veil; that veil is black."
I would that I could tear aside the veil, O Beloved, for seeing Thee as Thou
art, I might see Thee everywhere, even in the darkness that cometh to a point
yet goeth in a circle.
For Hadit, the core of every star, says "It is I that go," and Thou, Mother
of the Stars, criest "To me! To me!"
Resolve me the Riddle of Life, O Beloved, for loving Thee I would behold Thy
Secret Glory.
XXVIII .?. Sayings
Isis hath said: "I am all that was and that is and that shall be, and no
mortal hath lifted my veil."
Who cares what is back of the moon?
Jehovah showed his back unto Moses, saying: "No man hath seen my face at any
time."
Who cares to face the elements?
Hadit hath said: "I am life and the giver of life; therefore is the knowledge
of me the knowledge of death."
Who cares to know death?
But Thou, O Beloved, hath said: "I give unimaginable joys on earth,
certainty, not faith, while in life upon death, peace unutterable, rest,
ecstacy; nor do I demand aught in sacrifice."
Who would not long to invoke Thee under Thy Stars, O Beloved?
XXIX .?. The Falling Star
Falling, falling, falling! Thus fall the Rays from Thy Body of Stars upon
this tiny planet, O Beloved! Innumerable streams of Light like Star-rain upon
the black earth.
Since every man and every woman is a star, their lives are like unto streams
of light concentrated upon every point in Space.
As I lay with arms out-stretched, my bare body shining like ivory in the
darkness. my scarlet abbai flung wide, mine eyes fixed upon the star-lit
Heaven; I felt that I, too, was falling, falling, falling, in an ecstacy of
fear and love into the void abyss of space.
Then did I remember that Thou art continuous. Beneath, above, around me art
Thou. And lo, from a falling star I became as a comet wheeling in infinite
Circles, each at a different angle, till my course traced out the Infinite
Sphere that is the Symbol of Thee, O Beloved.
Then did I aspire to find the Centre of All.
And even now I am falling, falling, falling.
XXX .?. Justice
I am a Fool, O Beloved, and therefore am I One or Nought as the fancy takes
me.
Now am I come to Justice, so that I may be All or Naught according to the
direction of vision.
No Breath may stir the Feather of Truth, therefore is Justice ALone in L. Yet
the Ox-goad is Motion and Breath Matter if it be called the Ox which is
also A.
How foolish are these thoughts, which are but as the Sword in the hand of
Justice. They are as unbalanced as the Scales that stir not, being fixed in
the figure of Law above the Court House of a great City.
But Thou hast said: "Love is the law, love under will."
And Love is the Will to Change and Change is the Will to Love.
Even in the stern outline of the Scale s of Justice do I perceive the
Instrument of Love, and in the Life Sentence, the Mystery of Imprisonment in
Thy Being, O Beloved!
XXXI .?. Not
Three Eternities are passed... I have outstripped a million Stars in my race
across Thy Breast---The Milky Way.
When shall I come to the Secret Centre of Thy Being?
Time, thou thief, why dost thou rob the hungry babe? Space, thou hadst almost
deceived me.
O Lady Nuit, let me not confound the space-marks!
Then, O Beloved, Thy Word came unto me, as it is written: "All touching; All
penetrant."
Thus left I Time and Space and Circumstance, and every Star became as an atom
in my Body, when it became Thy Body. Now never shall I be known, for it is I
that go.
But Thou, O Beloved, though Thou art infinitely Great, art Thou not energized
by the Invisible Point---the Infinitely Small?
A Million Eternities are Present, Deem
not of Change; This is the
Here and Now,
and I am
NOT
-o-
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