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NetWit Vol.2 #29

From: MX%"[email protected].edu" 16-AUG-1992 20:40:44.94
To: COMPTEC91006
CC:
Subj: Netwit Volume 2, Number 29

To: [email protected]
X-Mailer: fastmail [version 2.3 PL11]

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected] (Jo Meachem)
Subject: Ture Story (smirk!)
Swiped from: rec.humor.funny (moderated):
______

Ture story, true story...what's the difference?

My sister is married to a Frenchman, and they live in France. At a party to
introduce her to the neighborhood, someone asked her:

"Do you Americans tell jokes about ethnic groups...like our Belgian jokes?"

My sister replied, "Yes, but they are more likely to be Polish jokes."

"But, why?" queried the puzzled neighbor. "They aren't stupid, like the
Belgians!"

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: Ury Segal <[email protected]>
Subject: Bumper Sticker
______

Bumper Sticker on Mini-minor:
This is my dreams car
I dream it's a Jaguar

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected]
Subject: Fakers
______

Q: Why do so many girls fake orgasms?
A: Because so many men fake foreplay.

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected] (James Stewart)
Subject: PussyCat
______

Reminds me of the one about the first grade class on the opening day of
school. The teacher, a Mrs. Prussy, introduces herself and tells the
kids that they can remember her name by recalling that it's just like
"pussy" (as in cat), with an 'r' added.

So the next morning, she asks the class, "And who remembered my name?"
Most of the kids raise their hands, and she calls on a boy. "Yes,
Johnny?" "Mrs. Crunt!" he replies.

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected] (26070-adams)
Subject: It's all in a name
Swiped from: rec.humor:
______

A new Asian American employee whose first and middle names are Hung Nam
joined our group, but preferrred to be called by the Anglicized version of
Hung, namely John. After introducing him to the department, we found ourselves
back at our secretary's office where I (And a few others) introduced the
new employee:

Bonnie, I'd like to meet John ..... You've already completed his
personnel paper work.

Bonnie in an effort to make our new engineer feel welcome jumped up and
extorted:

Oh! Glad to meet you, John. I thought you were Hung!

Obvious laughter erupted, followed by Bonnie turning beet red. Poor John,
not being up on these English vernacular expressions, had to wait until
lunch for an explanation of the humor.

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected] (Steven Vest)
Subject: Possums
Swiped from: rec.humor: [What, a joke in rec.humor?!?]
______

How many possums does it take to have sex?

Three. Two to do it and one to watch for cars.

______________________________________________________________________________

Submitted by: [email protected] (Roger David Carasso)
Subject: GERMAN CLASS
Swiped from: rec.humor:
______

My girlfriend just told me that she took German in college to meet her
humanities requirement. You'd think that German was the one subject
that wouldn't fulfill the humanities requirement.

__________________________Send Jokes--Have a nice day._________________________

The above collection of characters was mailed to you by Jeffrey H. Knodel.
The humor contained herin is in the public domain (unless otherwise noted),
and is yours to do with as you please. Submissions, questions, etc. should
be sent to [email protected].edu. To subscribe, send me a letter asking
to be added, and include your correct internet address in the body.

 
To the best of our knowledge, the text on this page may be freely reproduced and distributed.
If you have any questions about this, please check out our Copyright Policy.

 

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