Lack of Fathers Rights...Continued.

by djrob1

I was married for 2 years befor we tried having a baby, after 4 miscarriages we finally had our daughter. This had to be the best day of my life. Well, to cut to the chase, my wife was diagnosed with post partum depression; three months later she disappears with my daughter. Her parents, my parents and myself had to hire an investigator to find her, she was three states away living with some guy she had known before me.

Well, a lot of court dates followed and she was told she would have to move back to South Carolina until all was settled. All she ever said she just wasn't happy anymore. Of course she wasnt taking her meds for the depression, but she wanted a divorce. I didn't, but what was I to do.

Since no grounds for divorce were filled, like drug abuse, physical or mental abuse or cheating, we had to be seperated for 1 year. At that point my only crime was loving my wife and daughter, little was I to know that I now belonged to the courts.

It was crazy, I was in court every other weekend to answer allegations that could never be proven, even her mother wouldn't lie for her and say I was abusive. But still she tried. One such occasion, I am catholic and the service usually lasts about an hour, I took my daughter to church, she sat on my lap durring the service and I took her out once to change her. Then after church to the back for cookies, a kind of social thing , everybody wanted to see her because this was the church i grew up in. Well, a week later I was suppeoned to court and my visitation was cut in half because, and i quote the judge "church for 2 hours is no place for an infant", so now I was to have her back at her mothers by saturday night. This kind of stuff went on for the whole year we were seperated.

Then on the day of our divorce, april 1st, she tells me shes moving back to virginia because she got a really good job offer. The court said this was fine but she would have to bring my daughter to SC from Virginia, a 6 hour drive, for visitation. She aggreed and moved. I saw my daughter 1 time after that and they fell off the face of the earth. I drove to Virginia and tried to find them at addresses and phone numbers i had through the court, with no luck. I continued to show up to our meeting place for visitations for months and had police reports to prove that she never showed up. After 6 months of this I decided to stop paying child support. I felt like I was rewarding bad behavior by paying her to keep my daughter from me, I was tapped out financially and couldnt afford atty's fees anymore. Well, I figured that if I stopped paying the court would get me in there and ask why I wasn't paying and I could tell them that i haven't so much as talked to my daughter, let alone seen her in almost 8 months at that time.

Well, they couldn't care less and threw me in jail for 3 months over 4000 dollars of child support. It is now 4 years later and I still haven't seen my daughter, I dont even know where she is and i owe close to 20k in child support. I would pay it if I had it but I don't right now. I love my daughter and miss her very much and would do anything to see her again. The court is on the ladies side from the begining. My mother says all my wife wanted was someone to pay for her to have a baby. I dont know but I can tell you, be very careful guys. They dont play, the courts that is. Pay and pay and let them stomp you into the ground and ruin your life, but dont buck the system, it'll get you nowhere. Feel free to write me if ya want...peace