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A humourous look at the V- Chip
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
| CENSORSHIP ON THE INTERNET - A FUNNY DISCLAIMER FOR THE EASILY OFFENDED |
| A NIRVANAnet(tm) Infodose saved by Bardagh |
| Distributed via the NIRVANAnet(tm) text file distribution network |
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o
I ran across this yesterday on the Internet... thought it was quite funny,
while being just a bit scary, too. Think it's at least as appropriate as
some other stuff I've seen here... after all, depending on how this new
telecommunication law is interpreted, some of the topics we've discussed
will be illegal...
V-CHIP CONTENT WARNING: THIS POST IS RATED: R, V, NPC, RI, S, I13.
[For processing by the required-by-1998 V-chips, those reading this post
from an archive must set their V-chip to "42-0666." I will not be held
responsible for posts incorrectly filtered-out by a V-chip that has been
by-passed, hot-chipped, or incorrectly programmed.]
***WARNING!*** It has become necessary to warn potential readers of my
messages before they proceed further. This warning may not fully protect me
against criminal or civil proceedings, but it may be treated as a positive
attempt to obey the various and increasing numbers of laws.
* Under the ***TELECOM ACT OF 1996***, minor CHILDREN (under the age of 18)
may not read or handle this message under any circumstances. If you are
under 18, delete this message NOW. Also, if you are developmentally
disabled, irony-impaired, emotionally traumatized, schizophrenic, suffering
PMS, affected by Humor Deprivation Syndrome (HDS), or under the care of a
doctor, then the TELECOM ACT OF 1996 may apply to you as well, even if you
are 18. If you fall into one of these categories and are not considered
competent to judge for yourself what you are reading, DELETE this message
NOW.
* Under the UTAH PROTECTION OF CHILDREN ACT OF 1996, those under the age of
21 may not read this post. All residents of Utah, and Mormons elsewhere,
must install the M-Chip.
* Under the PROTECTION OF THE REICH laws, residents of Germany may not read
this post.
* Under the MERCIFUL SHIELD OF ALLAH (Praise be to Him!) holy
interpretations of the Koran of the following countries (but not limited to
this list) you may not read this post if you are a FEMALE OF ANY AGE: Iran,
Iraq, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Egypt, Jordan,
Sudan, Libya, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Algeria, Lebanon, Morocco, Tunisia,
Yemen, Oman, Syria, Bahrain, and the Palestinian Authority. Non-female
persons may also be barred from reading this post, depending on the
settings of your I-Chip.
* Under the proposed CHINESE INTERNET laws, covering The People's Republic
of China, Formosa, Hong Kong, Macao, Malaysia, and parts of several
surrrounding territories, the rules are so nebulous and unspecified that I
cannot say whether you are allowed to read this. Thus, you must SUBMIT any
post you wish to read to your local authorities for further filtering.
* In Singapore, merely be RECEIVING this post you have violated the will of
Lee Kwan Yu. Report to your local police office to receive your caning.
* Finally, if you are barrred from contact with the Internet, or protected
by court order from being disturbed by thoughts which may disturb you, or
covered by protective orders, it is up to you to adjust the settings of
your V-Chip to ensure that my post does not reach you.
*** THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE IN COMPLYING WITH THESE LAWS ***
Now, what was I going to say........
I forgot.
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