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Iraq jokes

Did you hear that US intelligence has reported that Saddam Hussein has
been killed over 1000 times?

Satellite photos have found his picture on over half of all Iraqi graves!

Also,

It has been just reported by the CIA that all the Iraqi impersonators
of Saddam Hussein are sexual perverts!

Because when they are found they are always shouting "SADDAM ME, SADDAM ME"!
End of article 4 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 5 (9 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Jim Mercer)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: Some Iraq Jokes...
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 25 Jan 91 03:24:11 GMT
References: <[email protected]>
Organization: Ed (the iguana) Memorial Society
Lines: 23

--MORE--(35%)In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Stefan A. Werner) writes:
>Some Iraq Jokes, for your amusement:
>
> Q: Why don't they have Sex Education and Driver Education in
> the same day in Iraq?
> A: The Camals would get too tired.
>
> Q: What do you call an Iraqi with a camal under one arm, and
> a lama under the other?
> A: Bi-sexual.

Q: Why do they call camels "Ships of the desert"?
A: 'cause they are full of Iraqi semen.

>+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
>| Stefan A. Werner |
>+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+

Stefan? What kinda name is Stefan? -----> 8^)

--MORE--(88%)--
[ Jim Mercer work: [email protected] home: [email protected] +1 519 570-3467 ]
[ "Clickity-Click, Barba-Trick" - The Barbapapas ]
End of article 5 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 6 (8 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Stefan A. Werner)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: Some Iraq Jokes...
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 25 Jan 91 15:26:51 GMT
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]>
Reply-To: [email protected] (Stefan A. Werner)
Organization: The Kurowulf Empire, FREE KUWAIT NOW!!!
Lines: 32

--MORE--(24%)In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Jim Mercer) writes:
>
>Stefan? What kinda name is Stefan? -----> 8^)
>
>--
>[ Jim Mercer work: [email protected] home: [email protected] +1 519 570-3467 ]

It's German, Jim. Actually, if you look in a name book, you'll find it
to mean something like "prince of many colors". As for where the
etomology(sp?) is based, I have absolutely no idea. Since I was a kid,
I hated my parents for giving me that name, but now that I'm an adult, I
kind of like it....

For a good laugh, I should show you how many diferent ways that gets spelled
on my third class mail... STEFAN, STEFFAN, STEFON, STEPHEN, STEHPON, STEPPEN,
STEPHAN, STEFEN, STEPPON, STEPPEN, and some others I can't remember...

Stefan A. Werner

--MORE--(62%)--
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
| FROM THE BOWELS OF THE KUROWULF EMPIRE |
| Stefan A. Werner |
| Help us to end Ragnarok... Kill a Blacksmith Today! |
| ..uunet!iczer1!saw Life is too short to keep wasting time. |
| ..tronsbox!iczer1!saw "Mina bimbo-ga warui-no yo!" |
| ..tdmnj!iczer1!saw "Don't dispair; If you're flat on your back, |
| there's no way to look but up." - R. W. Babson |
| (201) 478-6052 "Journalism is organized gossip." - E. Eggleston |
+-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+
End of article 6 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 7 (7 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (D. James McGregor)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: Some Iraq Jokes...
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 24 Jan 91 16:14:54 GMT
References: <[email protected]>
Organization: Strathclyde University, Glasgow
Lines: 12

--MORE--(58%)Very good! How about:

Q: How do you get 30 Iraqis in a telephone box?

A: Tell them it's not theirs.

--
.$.
| D. James McGregor "... and as I patrol in the valley of the shadow
| Strathclyde University of the Tricolor, I must fear evil; For I am but
| Glasgow, Scotland mortal, and mortals can only die ..." -Marillion
|
End of article 7 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 8 (6 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Andrew Eberhart)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: Some Iraq Jokes...
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 25 Jan 91 17:48:23 GMT
References: <[email protected]>
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque NM
Lines: 13

--MORE--(64%)In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Stefan A. Werner) writes:
>
>Some Iraq Jokes, for your amusement:
>

You forgot one.. :-)

Q. Why are camels called the ships of the desert?

A. Because they are filled with Iraqi seamen.
(semen for those of you who are a little slow...)

Andrew
End of article 8 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 9 (5 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Andrew Eberhart)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: cmsg cancel <[email protected]>
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 25 Jan 91 18:09:32 GMT
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]>
Organization: University of New Mexico, Albuquerque NM
Lines: 1

--MORE--(92%)This message was cancelled from within rn.
End of article 9 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 10 (4 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Marc WANDSCHNEIDER)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: A couple here:
Summary: Jokes
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 25 Jan 91 19:55:49 GMT
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]>
Sender: [email protected]
Organization: SOCS, McGill University, Montreal, Canada
Lines: 36

--MORE--(38%)
Here're a couple:

WHat do you call a gay Dinosaur...?

A: A megasoreass.

And.....:

There's this (bisexual) guy who works at a pickle factory. His job is at the
thing where the machine puts the lids on the jars of pickles. This machine
is right next to the pickle slicer.

EVERY day and night, this guy just FANTASIZES about the pickle slicer. He
cannot get it off his mind. It occupies all his thoughs, and he gets
excited every time he thinks about it.

Finally, one day, it gets to be too much, and he sticks his dick in it. His
boss just so happened to be walking by, sees him, and fires him.

So, the guy goes home dejected and all sad, and goes to his lover, "I got
fired today."
--MORE--(80%)
His gay lover gasps and walks up to him and takes off his pants.

"Well.... You're dick's fine. What happened to the pickle slicer...?"

"Oh, he got fired too."

Heh heh heh. I _slay_ myself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[email protected]
Marc Wandschneider
End of article 10 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 11 (3 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (good, Conan - good)
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: cmsg cancel <[email protected]>
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 26 Jan 91 06:10:34 GMT
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]> <[email protected]>
Sender: [email protected] (news access account)
Organization: Convex Computer Corporation; Richardson, TX
Lines: 11
Nntp-Posting-Host: cnvxla.convex.com

--MORE--(64%)In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Andrew Eberhartrites:
->This message was cancelled from within rn.

...and was NOT READ. :-)

--
Tony J. Podrasky It's not an illusion - it just looks like one.
El Segundo, Ca
[email protected] :-)
QSL? QRU? QRZ? QLZ? QFA?
End of article 11 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 12 (2 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected] (Drifter...)
Newsgroups: alt.sex,alt.prose,alt.sex.masturbation,alt.sex.bestiality

Subject: Story: Anitta's Second Pussy
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 26 Jan 91 09:38:04 GMT
Sender: [email protected]
Reply-To: [email protected] (Drifter...)
Followup-To: alt.sex
Organization: UF Nuclear Enginering Dept.
Lines: 501

--MORE--(1%)
This story may have already appeared in these newsgroups, as they were
cross-posted before with rec.arts.erotica. Due to the slowness of approval for
r.a.e postings, I am reposting the articles to the newsgroups, minus the r.a.e
crosspost.

WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING
===============================================================================
This story contains graphic and explicit depictions of various sex acts. If
you find such to be offensive, DO NOT READ THE ARTICLE! Hit n now to skip the
message.
This story is of an adult nature and is not intended for minors to read. if
you are a minor, well I can't stop you from reading it. But it is NOT intened
for you.
I am not responsible for any results, experiences, feelings, or actions that
follow from reading this article, good or bad.
Again, DO NOT READ THIS if you are easily offended or find explicit adult
material offensive!
Everyone else can email me comments, questions, criticisms, etc. I will
gladly, nay, ecstatically respond. Really. In fact, PLEASE mail me comments!!
Thank you.
===============================================================================

--MORE--(5%)





Last chance! Hit 'n' now to skip the article!
I mean it!
This is not for the timid, shy, easily offended, moralistically superior,
religious types, system administrators, old foggies, etc...







--MORE--(6%)




KITTY.TXT written September-October, 1990
Copyright (C) 1990 by Green Hell, Inc.
(Unlimited distribution is permitted as long as file remains unchanged.)

"Anitta's Second Pussy"
[YET ANOTHER INFAMOUS GREEN HELL PRODUCTION]

--------
The problem with a kitten is THAT,
Eventually it grows up to be a CAT!
--Unknown
--------

Kittens are very adorable animals, with their soft and fluffy fur, their
cute little high-pitched meows. And of course they are so much fun to watch
--MORE--(8%)when at play.
Watching the fuzzy, clumsy things rolling and bounding across the carpet,
Anitta found her resistance breaking down. Her friend Josie had been pushing
Anitta to take one of the kittens.
"You don't have *any* other pets, your apartment building allows cats,
and they are real easy to take care of." Josie was almost like an eager
saleswoman at a department store, trying to convince a customer how easy it
would be to buy just that one little item.
"I don't know..." Anitta said, watching as one grayish kitten jumped up
and down on a sibling in fiendish mock-battle. "The last cat I had was back
when I was just a kid. He got hit by a car." She looked a bit sad about this,
but smiled when a black and white patterned kitten tumbled two of its
siblings over in one swipe, then lost its balance and fell on its rump.
"Then it's been too long since you had a pussy cat," Josie said with
confidence.
"Yes," Anitta said, reaching out to stroke one of the quieter kitten's on
the head, "it's been too long."

Chaos stalked the rubber mouse carefully, body hugged to the kitchen
floor with his tail wagging in the air. Anitta watched from the counter,
stifling an urge to laugh at the young cat's seriousness. When she had chosen
the black and white kitten, it had adjusted to her apartment rapidly, after a
few days of meowing for its companions. To keep Chaos (who fast earned the
--MORE--(12%)name) happy, she had bought several cat toys and spent much of her free time
playing with him.
Now the high speed kitten was a young cat, nearly a year old. The rubber
mouse, unsuspecting of its fate, contemplated Anitta with eyes of black
plastic.
Don't look at me, Anitta thought, it's not like you're going to suffer.
Chaos bounded across the short distance between him and the toy, which
gave a wheezy squeak of surprise. After chewing and pulling at it for several
minutes, Chaos determined that the enemy was defeated and the kitchen once
again safe for Democracy. The mouse was slightly more chewed and looked like
it might be considering a change of occupation.
Chaos ran suddenly from the kitchen to the apartment hallway, then walked
reagally to Anitta's chair and began to rub up against her legs, purring
loudly. "Mrrroowww?"
"You had your supper," Anitta said, "this is mine." She used one
stockinged foot to caress Chaos back, who flopped down onto his side and
started to bat at it. "Hey, that's my foot, not a toy!" Anitta poked Chaos so
that he rolled onto his back. She noted that as usual he had an erection. The
bright red tip of the penis peeked out from its short, furred sheath. She
had not yet gotten around to getting him fixed, since she had no other cats
and he was kept in the apartment all the time. This meant that Chaos tended
to be in a regular state of excitement, especially after playing.
"Mrrrrrrph..." Chaos suddenly shifted as if a flea were itching him and
--MORE--(17%)started to lick his penis. Anitta felt strangely invasive watching him so she
looked back at her plate.
"Me and you both, kid. At least you can lick your trouble spot." Anitta
sighed and pushed the plate away. No boyfriend for the last six months, and
only two one-night stands. Her job at the bank and her studies at school were
so demanding that sometimes she felt like just saying "fuck it!"
Time for Mr. Vibrator, Anitta decided. It was Friday night, a time when
many people were partying or playing. An absence of a party, Anitta thought,
I might as well fuck myself silly.
She dumped the remains of her meal in the garbage, left the plate in the
sink, and went to the bedroom. Chaos ignored his owner, continuing with his
cleaning.
"Mrrpth."

Like A Virgin? Deep Throat II? Maybe a classic... Of course, Peter North
has a yummy body and big, juicy balls...
Anitta pulled the XXX-rated videotape out of its box and loaded it into
the VCR. Usually it was fine to just fantasize, but tonight she wanted to
fuck someone so bad that even watching a guy doing it to someone else would
be a pleasure. As the tape started up, Anitta removed her clothes without any
attempt to be graceful or neat. She unbuttoned her blouse, then tugged down
the zipper in the back of her skirt, managing to fall back on the bed.
"Woops." Eager bitch, aren't you? she commented to herself. On the TV
--MORE--(21%)screen, the credits had already gone by against a background of slurping,
moaning acters from the movie. Now Peter North as some idiot office worker
was in bed with his wife and a hard-on, which poked the sheets up. The effect
was somewhat silly looking.
Skirt removed and left on the floor, Anitta rubbed her crotch through her
pantyhose. "Yeah," she said in excitement, "that's the ticket." She continued
to rub herself through the pantyhose, deliberately staining them. They were
an old pair, so why not get a bit of extra use out of them before throwing
them away?
Naughty girl, Anitta thought. Ruining your underwear!
Peter North had already bugged his porno wife into letting her fuck him,
but the bitch didn't seem too interested. She just laid there in her curlers
as his long, smooth bone slid in plump, blonde cunt. She spent her time
eating a banana and doing her nails while Mr. North grunted and exerted
himself.
Anitta's hand was a bit sticky with strained lubricants so she wiped it
across the stocking along her thigh. Moving back on the bed so she could lean
up against the walls and cushions behind her, she admired Mr. North's large,
bouncing testicles. Having seen the movie more than several times, Anitta was
aware of how much semen would be pumped out of those hairy globes.
"Isn't it good honey?" Peter asked his disinterested, fictional wife.
"Oh yeah," Anitta said. She had soaked her pantyhose enough so that she
could wring out the juice if she wanted too. Somehow she had gotten very
--MORE--(26%)excited, more quickly than usual. Too long between fucks, she thought. She
spread her legs wide and flat, straining her muscles against the elastic
synthetic of the pantyhose. Her powder blue blouse was still on, open wide to
let her breasts sit freely in the air. The pleasant fragrance of the perfume
she had dabbed between them rose up to her nostrils. No one at the bank had
seemed to take notice, though.
Peter North was groaning as he pumped his wife, laying on her back. He
pulled out with a grunt and a gasp. Anitta shoved her right hand under the
pantyhose to start frigging herself, timing it with Peter's unloading of cum.
Big, juicy streams of pearly white coated the porno wife's stomach and chest,
piling up into messy layers.
"Uuuhhmmmmmm," Anitta moaned, her index and middle fingers stroking the
inside of her vagina. She whimpered a bit at the soft paws of pleasure
flickering in her tummy. Impatient for full access to her quim, Anitta peeled
the pantyhose down to her knees and put her right hand back in her crotch as
she wrestled the undergarment off with her right. For a moment she looked
terribly silly. Then, with a content little sigh, she laid back and spread
her legs. No ordinary little stir session was this going to be! Anitta wanted
to pretend as much as possible that she was being fucked.
Peter North and several other studs were on screen now, stumbling through
bad dialogue. Anitta flicked her right nipple with her left hand. The cone
around it had already swelled with blood to form a brown, shiny base.
Flicking her nipple made Anitta gasp, and wish her breasts were big enough so
--MORE--(31%)she could suck her own nipples. Her bust size was only 34, though.
Phooey, Anitta thought.
On the screen, Christy Canyon was in the president's office, apparently
getting very turned on by thoughts of Corporate Power. Anitta fantasized
about having breasts like Christy's, big enough to suck her own nipples with
ease. She had to content herself with twirling a moistened index finger
around the nipples, making shivery shocks go through them and into her puffy
quim. Inspired by Christy's loud, whimpering moans, she rubbed her right
hand's thumb pad against her clit, leisurely building up the tension of a
climax.
"Meeeooww?"
"Jesus," Anitta exclaimed. She had forgotten entirely about Chaos. Now
the cat had stalked into her bedroom, looking for her. The cat jumped onto
her bed and made a small, inquisitive sound.
"Now now fella," Anitta said. She swept the cat off the bed by sliding
her right leg over. The young tom fell off the bed and glared at his owner
for a moment before sniffing under the bed for dust bunnies.
Christy Canyon had been joined by a quiet, short-haired blonde, who was
now enthusiastically tonguing Christy's brown and pink pussy. Christy moaned
loudly regularly, displaying real and great enjoyment of the licking she was
getting. Anitta wasn't bisexual and rarely fantasized about lesbianism, but
Christy seemed to enjoy this treatment a great deal. Anitta fingred herself
carefully, wishing she had a guy there to clean her cream out. She wasn't
--MORE--(36%)fussy, any willing guy would due. But there was only Anitta and her fingers.
Oh, and her vibrator.
"OH yes!!" Christy cried out, humping her crotch against the petite
blonde's mouth. "Ooohh uuuh uuuuh Uuuh UUUUUHH!" Her big, unenhanced titties
bounced and jumped with her shudders of orgasm. The jiggles went unnoticed,
since Anitta was retrieving her vibrator from underneath the pillow. Rather
than a limited, battery powered type, Anitta had a full 110 volt, three
speed, multi-head machine, the kind advertised as a "massage device". As
Christy Canyon gave little hiccuppy sigh-moans of contentment, Anitta
attached the round bulb stimulator to her vibrator.
Ignored and rebuffed, Chaos had gone sniffing for something to play with.
The floor under the bed was distressingly free of dust bunnies (a dead bug
proved only slightly amusing when batted with a paw), so the tom had looked
for any new thing in his owner's room. He had discovered the discarded
clothes quickly enough. The skirt was familiar but the pantyhose weren't.
Chaos was drawn to the pair by a strong, musky odor. He touched his nose to
the stretchy fabric and smelled the female musk of sexual excitement. He
started purring, buried his face further into the damp material, and kneaded
it eagerly with his paws.
"Well hello there," Christy Canyon said to the company vice-president who
had just appeared on the screen, right after Christy had finished licking off
her blonde friend. Anitta had been ignoring the screen, letting the moans and
guttural cries stimulate her imagination as the vibrating bulb slid up and
--MORE--(41%)down inside her pussy lips. Lubricant shined on the plastic head and the lips
that clung to it. Her first climax was getting close, blood pumping into a
tight hooded bud of flesh. She watched as the new porno stud, Paul
something?, was stripped by Christy and her friend. His cock was not quite as
thick as Peter's but it was longer and still plenty meaty with nice veins and
it bobbed around as he moved and Christy started masaging it and Anitta
placed the bulb against her clit to make the come really blow.
"AUUHHH! AAAHHHH! AAAh Aaahhh," she cried, clenching her thighs together,
the pulsations of her pussy feeling like soft fingers kneading her crotch on
the inside. "Aaaaah... ahhhh... aahhhh that's nice..." She had stuck the
fizzing bulb of the device back in her crevice to draw out her climax in an
almost painful manner. Now she clicked it off and let it lay on the bed
between her legs. Christy Canyon was currently sucking on her boss's wagging
cock, an eager expression on her face as she "mmmmmph"ed and "Hmmmmm!"ed in
pleasure.
A little quick on the trigger, Anitta thought. God I needed it so bad...
Loud purrings attracted Anitta's attention. She leaned forward and saw
Chaos kneading her pantyhose into clumps, his whole face stuffed into the
crotch, eyes closed. She was puzzled for a moment, then realization struck.
Anitta felt embarrassed that her pussy oils were obviously exciting the young
tom.
"Hey Chaos, come here boy. Here kitty, kitty, kitty..." Anitta made
smacking noises with her mouth to attract the cat's attention. His ears
--MORE--(46%)pricked up at her and his eyes opened a bit, but he didn't stop purring or
kneading. Feeling odd, Anitta reached out and snagged the pantyhose, now
badly torn. "Jeez..." she said. The odd feeling was really churning in her
now, and something was nipping at the edges of her mind. Chaos had plopped
himself down after being separated from the undergarment. Now, rear legs
supporting himself and front paws splayed to the sides, Chaos had started
licking his little red cock. Anitta was watching.
Christy Canyon was pretending to be really getting off on a tit fuck, but
Anitta was feeling suddenly very nasty and wicked. She watched Chaos
carefully, starting to stroke her crotch with one hand. His pink, round-ended
tongue was making a muffled lapping noise as he licked his genitals. A bag of
black fur and flesh hung just under the sheath of the penis. Anitta figured
that proportionally, the balls were bigger than Mr. North's.
This is sick, Anitta thought, getting turned on by a tom cat. Sick and
nasty.
Memories tumbled into her mind, memories of when she had been 13 years
old and had been given a cat for a present. Named it Fluffy. Slept almost
every night with Fluffy by her head on the pillow. Until several years later
he had wandered too far into the street.
But unburied by sharp sensory reminders were the memories of when she had
woke up one night with Fluffy curled up between her legs, his warm and furry
bulk pressing through the thin bed sheet. Her nightshirt. Against her panties
and her private place. At 13, she had only her parent's somewhat vague
--MORE--(51%)explanation of sex, but this weight against her privates felt good. She
stroked Fluffy and he responded with a contented rumbling. Pushing his bulk
against her crotch, the little girl Anitta discovered warm and wonderful
feelings in her tummy and privates. She didn't know she was lubricating until
Fluffy yawned, stretched, and then sniffed. He snuffled at her crotch, making
the little Anitta thrilled and scared and confused.

A full grown and experienced Anitta was breathing hard at the memory
which she had buried from shame and grief. She remembered how she had just
laid there that night with Fluffy sniffing at her completely virginal and
tender cunny. She had never even played with herself back then, so the
sensations were quite unique to her.
"Oh God," Anitta moaned. She fell back on the bed and slid three fingers
into her pussy, finding it loose and sloppy. Her mouth was dry with
excitement, forbidden thoughts and memories swirling in her head.
"Ooooooh..." Trembling fingers plucked soft, spongy tissue, stirring Anitta's
cunny cream into a froth and making sticky slurpy noises. "Uuummm it's so
good... I was such a nasty little uuummmm girl..." Anitta stretched her outer
pussy lips out and back to make her clit stick out like a piece of glossy red
candy. Extended, her pinky nail slid under the cap of flesh and scratched the
bud underneath. Anitta whimpered at the sharp pleasure.
In her mind's eye, she envisioned the little girl she had been, short
curly blonde hair topping a fair skinned face of simple prettyness. Her
--MORE--(56%)bedroom had been small, with pink stripes and flowers alternating on the wall
paper. Lace had edged her bed sheets and pillow cases, her curtains and
nightshirts. Posters of unicorns and horses had been taped neatly to the
walls, along with one of David Cassidy. The room had held a faint smell of
lilacs and honeysuckle.

The 13 year-old Anitta had been pleased and confused after that first
night. The next time she woke up with Fluffy laying against her crotch,
several nights later, she laid still for over ten minutes. Her flower printed
bed sheets had been crumpled to one side sometime during the night, so the
cat had been resting on just her nightshirt. The warmth and softness of his
body was very noticeable through the two thin layers of cloth that hid the
young girl's cunniken. Cautiously, so as not to disturb Fluffy, she pulled at
her nightshirt to slide it out from under the cat. The soft fabric made a
faint ssshing noise, the only accompaniment to her nervousness and excitement.
Then the hem of her nightgown was around her tummy and Fluffy was laying on
his side against the slope between little Anitta's thighs. These same thighs
were spreading automatically, just to accompany the cat. White cotton was the
only barrier between Fluffy's body and the innocent girl's cunny.

As an adult, Anitta had fucked many men, some good and some bad and some
that were so nice that she didn't care what their performance was like. But
none of them, and no fantasizing, had had the effect on her that this simple
--MORE--(61%)memory was. She was teasing herself unmercifully, nudging her fattened
clitoris with one finger or the other as the rest explored her slick cunt.
Musky oils and lubricants had flowed out to run into the crack of her ass,
tickling her anal rosebud. Panting like a marathon runner, she clenched her
bed sheet with one hand and arched her hips high up in the air. She felt like
a bitch in heat, just waiting for a prick to stuff its way in her caveronous
cunt and rip her inside out. The emptiness of it almost made her cry.

Snuggled in her comfy warm bed, little Anitta lay breathing as quietly as
possible, which was very difficult. All the oxygen seemed to have rushed out
of the air and her mouth was sticky-dry. She was also aware of something
between her legs. Mom had explained about periods, but this didn't seem to be
what she had talked about. The little maiden wondered if she had weed
herself. It was feeling wet down there, and there was a sort of tingle too.
She couldn't help shifting her bottom around, because of the itching. This
caused Fluffy to wake up and move. Little Anitta felt an immediate pang of
regret, though she didn't understand what was going on.
Fluffy stood up and stretched in that back-arching manner that cats do.
He nestled back down on the cushiony mattress, then caught the odor of the
child's cunny. The moisture had crept through the cotton panties slowly and
impregnated them with just a faint scent of her developing womanhood. Fluffy
sniffed closer, and then thrilled little Anitta by rasping his tongue against
the smooth fabric.
--MORE--(66%) "Oh, good kitty!" little Anitta had exclaimed softly. She didn't know
why, it just seemed like Fluffy deserved the praise. More licks followed, the
scratchy sound of the cat's tongue faint but clear in the room's stillness.
poster of David Cassidey on her wall and wondered why it always made her feel
giddy to think about kissing him. But not as giddy as she felt now.

Ignored, the VCR dutifully decoded magnetic imprints into an image of
Peter North sliding his cock into a boisterous Christy Canyon. "Oh Gaaaawhhd!
Oh caaa-caaan you feel me come?!! Caaaa... caan you fffeel me coming all over
your COCK?!"
Anitta's body was tensed up like a revving motorcycle. Sweat glistened on
her white skin, soaking the sheets under her ass and back. Every time she
shifted, the sheets stuck to her. The discomfort was amplified by her
sensitivity, making it just another part of the tremendous thump she was
building. Humming with authority, her vibrator was torturing its way across
her body. She had used the flat, wide head on her breasts until she thought
the nipples would spurt like little cocks. They were, in fact, seeping a tiny
bit of fluid, ooze from glands tortured to produce something not available.
Attached now to the metal peg of the vibrator was the clitoris cup.
Unbearable as agony, its vibrations beat at Anitta's clit unmercifully,
threatening to abrade the skin.
"Oh oh oh oH! OHH! It hurts! Oh fuck I'm gonnaaAAAUUUHHHH!!" Anitta
dropped the vibrator and tugged at the clitoris as if it were a cock and she
--MORE--(71%)could make it squirt. Anitta whined and came, gulping in great breaths of air
every few moments. As the intensity lessened, she moaned until the trembles
of her climax went away, leaving her weak but still tense.
"I don't believe it..." Anitta blinked sweat from her eyes. "I know I'm
going to do it and I can't believe it anyways." She got up shakily and looked
to see Chaos curled up on her skirt. She stumbled into her bathroom and peed.
When she got up from the toilet she looked at herself in the mirror. A
sweaty, crazed face looked back.
"I'm going to do it," she said to her reflection. She turned on the tap.
Cupped her hands under the stream. Slurped up the water. She rinsed her face
off and dried it with a towel. She had to dry her thighs off too because of
the flow that had dripped down. Breathing hard, Anitta left the bathroom, one
hand fluttering near her crotch. She punched at the VCR several times and
then managed to shut it off.
"Chaos... kitty kitty kitty..." Chaos picked up his ears. A few more
calls and he opened his eyes to look at his owner. Anitta knelt on the floor
by the cat, feeling so wicked and nasty. With her index and middle finger,
she scooped out some of her pussy juices and held them out to the cat. He
immediately picked himself up and started lapping at her fingers. Rasping
noises and Anitta's panting were the only sound for the moments it took Chaos
to clean off all of the juices.
"Good Chaos. Yes, you're such a good kitty..." Anitta scooted herself
forward, spreading her knees and raising off her knees, until her crotch was
--MORE--(76%)positioned over the tom's head. "Come on Chaos... Here's more for you..." She
was tensed in this position, bent back just slightly with her hands on the
bed behind her, supporting. Chaos purred and stuck his face into Anitta's
cunt making her tense more, before he finally lapped at the slit several
times.
"uuuuuhhuu-uh-uh! Oh good good kitty!" Anitta was practically whimpering.
"My sweet baby cat, lick mommy's pussy..." She did whimper when the cat's
excited lapping brushed her clitoris. Chaos's tongue was much smaller than
the others that had been down there, but its rough scratchiness on tender,
sensitive skin was exquisite. And he kept lapping rapidly, like at a bowl of
milk. Anitta did sob after several minutes of the torture. If she hadn't
urinated earlier, she would lost her bladder right there.
Chaos was getting aggressive, pushing forward with surprisingly strong
muscles. His muzzle was damp and he was salivating a great deal. The pink,
flat tongue darted in and out like a spring-loaded toy. There was little
penetration but its scratchy surface slipped over Anitta's outer lips, the
inner lips, and occasionally her clit. Her muscles were starting to tremble
from holding herself in this squatting position
"Y-y-you're mommy's *best* kitty! Uhhuh! Oh God!! Please, please, please,
pleasepleasepleeeeezzzeeee..." Anitta couldn't stand it anymore. She nudged
her cat's head out of the way and stroked her clit several times to bring
herself off. Chaos, not to be rebuffed, started licking at her hand and
consequently her clit. Anitta screamed one syllable and started bouncing
--MORE--(81%)herself up and down on her knees as she came, startling Chaos away for the
moment. After a minute, she stopped coming. And started crying.
"Oooohhhh... Puh-poor fluuhffy... Oohhhhhh!!" Slumping forward, Anitta
relieved the loss of her favorite childhood pet with unexpected intensity. Her
first climax, at 14, had been when playing with herself while Fluffy lay
purring beside her head on the pillow. She had always thought of the cat as
the one to first bring her towards the realm of sex, in later years. Grief
over Fluffy's death and then misdirected guilt had formed a barrier over the
memories. And some sort of shame about the effect the cat had had on her.
"Mrrreeoow?" Chaos cried, sensing a disturbance in his owner. Anitta
sniffled and picked up the cat, cuddling him tightly. She kissed his forehead
and said "You're so sweet. Yes you are!" She smiled as he started purring.
His fur was damp all over his face. Anitta stood up and then sat on the bed,
cradling the cat in her arms. Chaos's gold-brown eyes were part-way open,
looking at Anitta. She petted him and hugged him, just enjoying the feel of
his warm, soft furred body against hers. After a while, she laid back and let
Chaos curl up on her tummy and relax.
The weight felt good, but the soft fur against her naked skin was even
better. Chaos's body rose and fell slightly with Anitta's own breathing. She
had opened her legs a bit to allow the heat of her cunt escape freely.
Getting easier to accept it, she thought. You're a pervert. She smiled a bit
at the thought, then stroked Chaos gently from head to tail tip. Carefully,
than, she took his tail and brushed it against her crevice. The fur tickled
--MORE--(86%)at first, but then it got wet and tickled a bit less. Chaos had opened his
eyes again and was looking a bit surprised. His tail-tip was being introduced
into his owner's crevice, pushing into her inner sanctum.
"Good kitty," Anitta reassured the cat, petting him with her other hand.
"I just want to see how it feels..." The hair on this thin, fleshy intruder
was being matted back while Anitta shivered at the sensation of fur inside
her cunt. Several inches were now inside her, not filling her up but making
her very warm and gooey. Then, apparently annoyed at the abuse of his
precious tail, Chaos gave a little growl and flicked the tip. Anitta gasped
and jerked and Chaos whipped his tail away entirely, making her gasp again.
"Oh wow," Anitta breathed. "If only..." She imagined a guy with a long,
thin cock that could wiggle and twitch inside her. Then she imagined Chaos
sliding his whole tail in her and she moaned.
Chaos had climbed off Anitta's tummy and was cleaning his tail eagerly.
In the position her was in to do this, Anitta saw his little red cock again.
"Oh poor kitty. No one to fuck, just like me." She felt a bit guilty about
this, as she should have had the cat fixed months ago. He hadn't even been
allowed out to find some friendly little pussy.
Nasty chills slithered up Anitta's spine. She leaned forwards and
flattened herself out on the bed, facing her cat. "Good kitty," she said.
"Sweet kitty..." She placed one finger under a furry ball and hefted it.
Chaos's cleaning action slowed a bit. Anitta carefully brushed his cock tip.
It looked almost like the end of a ball-point pen, with the point retracted.
--MORE--(91%)She could see now that a thin, clear fluid leaked from the tip.
"Do you want it bad, Chaos?" Anitta giggled. "Mommy will make you feel
better." She used her index and thumb of the right hand to pull back the
sheath of the penis, revealing its short length. Strange little hairs were
visible near its base. Chaos had stopped cleaning all together and slowly
laid back on his side. Anitta used her right index finger to stroke his
penis, which quickly soaked the finger tip. She was afraid to taste the fluid
but she was very excited about it. What did kitty cum look like? she thought.
She stroked the quivering, dripping cock, which was very hard, admiring its
flaming red color and the bevel point of it.
"merrrooowww," Chaos exclaimed. Anitta could see his breathing was faster
by the rise and fall of his sides. She experimented a bit and found a
remarkably sensitive spot that made the tom make funny noises every time she
rubbed it. He wasn't purring now but his tail was starting to whip back and
forth.
"Good kitty, it's ok, you'll feel allll better in a bit." Anitta was
sliding her legs open and shut behind her, squeezing out pussy batter that
stained her bed sheets. Her pinky on her left hand stretched out to poke the
tiny, swollen testicles. "Allllll better," Anitta panted. She leaned forward
a bit closer and watched the red cock intensely. Chaos was making a sort of
growling-purr noise and whipping his tail all over. Then he stiffened and
Anitta wished she could come at the same time as whitish fluid dribbled out
of her kitty's cock, onto her fingers. She could feel the twitches in the
--MORE--(96%)tiny fur-bag as semen was pumped out. Chaos gave a loud yowl when he came,
then scampered away from Anitta.
"It's ok Chaos," she said. "We can play some more later..." She took her
right hand, wet with the tom's spunk, and rubbed it between her legs. It was
her imagination, but it seemed her cunny burned where the fluid brushed
against it. "Such a sweet kitty," she whispered, cupping one breast as she
diddled herself to another come.
It was only Friday night, too!

--*** THE END ***--

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[email protected] or CARL%[email protected]
Kill the spirit and you'll be blind, in the end it's always the same,
Play with fire you'll burn your fingers and lose your home in the flames.
It's over it's done, the end has begun, If you listen to fools, the Mob rules!
[*DISCLAIMER* - Contents is not connected with UF or NucEng department.]
End of article 12 (of 14)--what next? [npq] Article 13 (1 more) in alt.sex.bestiality:
From: [email protected]
Newsgroups: alt.tasteless,alt.sex.bestiality,rec.humor

Subject: Re: A couple here:
Message-ID: <[email protected]>
Date: 27 Jan 91 02:52:19 GMT
References: <[email protected]> <[email protected]> <[email protected]>
Organization: Curtin University of Technology
Lines: 11

--MORE--(53%)


 
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