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Computer Melvins
<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>
<> -Computer Melvins- <>
<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>-<>
A computer Melvin is one who:
Is either under 5 feet tall or over 6 feet tall, not weighing over 100 pounds.
Buttons his shirt all the way up, until his face is blue.
Has zits that glow in the dark.
Has Bi-focals by the age of 12.
Wears Kangaroo Shoes
Falls on his face, whenever a girl walks within 20 feet of him.
Jacks his pants up all the way up to his neck.
Watches Dr. Who every Saturday night at 11:15, and thinks K-9 is the greatest.
Carries his books with both hands.
Attacks flies.
Has a pet frog.
Speaks Chinese.
Tucks in their regulation P.E. shirt, and wears matching brown socks.
Thinks personal hygein is a word processor.
Has keep out signs on his door.
Has not been able to open his locker since 5th grade.
Boasts to girls how much "K" his computer has.
Has every single game created by man, and paid for them all.
People call him a geek, he thinks it's compliment.
Can convert every number into Hexa-decial, and then into binary, in his head.
Is as social as a skunk.
Has a password to gain entrance to everone of his disks.
Brings a Flip 'n' File 50's to school.
Watches GI Joe on channel 13, every weekday at 5:00.
Trying to pass someone in Driver's Ed will shift to 'P' thinking it means pass.
======================================
If 1 to 3 of these apply, there is still hope; unplug your computer for one
month, if you can do this you may still live a normal life.
If 4 to 7 of these apply, complete cold turkey is neccesary to salvage what's
left of your life.
If 8-12 of these apply, you are a complete loser, at most, you have one friend
and he probably fits in this catagory too. Start thinking what sanaterium you
want to go to.
If 13-19 of these apply, you care about nothing and nobody, you stand no chance
at having a normal life.
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