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The Physical Apperance of Intelligent Aliens
Subject: Your boss may be an alien!
From: [email protected] (Doug Mackensie)
Organization: Doug's Den BBS/Boston MA
Keywords: rec.humor, chuckle
YOUR CO-WORKER COULD BE A SPACE ALIEN, SAY EXPERTS ... here's
how you can tell (by Michael Cassels of the "National
Inquirer")
Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look
human - but you can spot these visitors by looking for
certain tip-offs, say experts.
They listed 10 signs to watch for:
1. Odd or mismatched clothes. "Often space aliens don't
fully understand the different styles, so they wear
combinations that are in bad taste, such as checked pants
with a striped shirt or a tuxedo jacket with blue jeans or
sneakers," noted Brad Steiger, a renowned UFO investigator
and author.
2. Strange diet or unusual eating habits. Space aliens
might eat French fires with a spoon or gobble down large
amounts of pills, the experts say.
3. Bizarre sense of humor. Space aliens who don't
understand earthly humor may laugh during a serious company
training film or tell jokes that no one understands, said
Steiger.
4. Takes frequent sick days. A space alien might need extra
time off to "rejuvenate its energy," said Dr. Thomas Easton,
a theoretical biologist and futurist.
5. Keeps a written or tape recorded diary. "Aliens are
constantly gathering information." said Steiger.
6. Misuses everyday items. "A space alien may use
correction fluid to paint its nails," said Steiger.
7. Constant questioning about customs of co-workers. Space
aliens who are trying to learn about earth culture might ask
questions that seem stupid, Easton said.
"For example, a co-worker may ask why so many Americans
picnic on the Fourth of July," noted Steiger.
8. Secretive about personal life-style and home. "An alien
won't discuss domestic details or talk about what it does at
night or on weekends," said Steiger.
9. Frequently talks to himself. "An alien may not be used
to speaking as we do, so an alien may practice speaking,"
Steiger noted.
10. Displays a change of mood or physical reaction when near
certain high-tech hardware. "An alien may experience a mood
change when a microwave oven is turned on," said Steiger. The
experts pointed out that a co-worker would have to display
most if not all of these traits before you can positively
identify him as a space alien.
-- Doug Mackensie [email protected]
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