Smoking Hash
by John Q. Adequate
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The Introduction
Hash, eh? What's not to love? It's strong and potent, it lasts and gives you one hell of a time - if you've lucked out and ran into some top-notch product.
Presuming that is the case, what you want is a cost - effective and simple method to consume it. People have been smoking hash for centuries, and all the best methods are well known to the "in-the-know" population.
The Reasoning
You have, first and foremost, the hookah. The gourmet's choice. Than, there is the water pipe, for the conformist junkie. Next, the regular pipe - for the urban stoner on the move. Popper bottles, for quick and undetectable consumption.
Another way to smoke it is to crush it in a joint, with tobacco or with weed.
Which brings me to the point of this article. Hash joints are a damn waste of good product. You took the risk to get it, you spent your cash on it. Better make it worth your while.
In fact, none of the above methods are as economical, easy to conceal and hassle-free as the one described here.
The Method
Unlike Marlon Brando's Method, this one is accessible to all, with little effort required. Things you need:
- 1 sewing needle
- 1 2 dl glass cup
- 1 straw (the ones that bend are the best)
- 1 bottle cap (plastic)
- A hard, rubbery surface
- Hash, of course!
What to do?
You take the needle and puncture the top of the plastic bottle cap. Go all the way. This is done to make the needle stand at a 90 degree angle, with the cap acting as the base.
Put the hash (quarter of a gram is enough for 2 recreational junkies, or a proffesional one, mileage may vary) on the tip of the needle. Don't impale it, though, because it may crumble and you require a solid piece. Just gently nudge it at the needle, it will stick.
Light up the hash until it starts burning. Quickly, cover the whole setup with the glass. In a few moments, the flame will burn up all the oxygen inside the glass. With the flame out, the hash will start to give off lots of smoke.
This is where the hard, rubbery surface and a glass with smooth edges come into play. You need a nearly air-tight chamber in order to yield the best results. Little or no smoke should be coming out.
When the inside of the glass becomes all hazy, lift it up an inch and suck as much smoke as you need with the straw. The bend in it will make this a lot easier than it sounds.
The quantity and thickness of the hash nugget will dictate the volume of smoke, and after a few tries, you will learn to use just the right amount.
The Genius of It
Strewn randomly across your room, all the things needed to make the Method work are completely inconspicous. No one is going to become nosy about an innocent-looking sewing needle and an empty glass with a straw in it. A bottle cap? There is at least one in every household, just like TV, and incest.
Just make sure to wash the glass regularly, lest it becomes slightly yellow from all the burned hash tar.
The Epilogue
So there you have it, kids. Stay safe, stay healthy and stay in school, and remeber: if you get caught doing or participating in an illegal activity, you didn't hear this from me!
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