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Interstellar Times V10 - How to Fool PG&E
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* The Interstellar Times - Volume X *
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* Written by the Dimension Master & Giggler *
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* "What to do when you're just plain fed up with PG&E" 8-22-91 *
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Suppose you've had a hard day at work. The boss caught you reading
the Interstellar Times (the pot guide) when you should have have building
widgets. You come home only to find that your toy poodle, Fang, has left
his own display of affection on your living room rug. On top of all this,
your PG&E bill is sitting on the counter. You think to your self, "I think
I'll go bash the fuckin' shit out of the electricity meter with my
Lousiville Slugger." Relax, think about what you are doing, and deal with
things rationally. I didn't say legally, just rationally.
You can go bash in the meter. PG&E won't accuse you. They don't want
to put you, a paying customer, in jail. Instead, they might just send you a
letter telling you to watch out for a neighborhood vandal and simply replace
the meter (free).
HOW TO FOOL PG&E
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Your meter, if you are average and have an analog one, is a glass dome
in a metal frame, in a metal meter. There are 2 screws, and a stranded
wire holding this thing together. There is a stamped piece of lead on the
wire so they know you haven't tampered with the meter.
STEP1:
Cut the wire right next to the lead and take off the glass covering.
Now pull out the meter. You will feel the gears disengage.
You now have a couple of choices. You can just leave it out for a
while, you can can pull it out just far enough so the gears won't turn,
or you can put it in upside down so that it will run backwards for a while.
IMPORTANT NOTE: PG&E monitors your bill. Any significant change WILL be
noticed. I recommend going from $300 to $200, $300 to $150, or $300 to
$175. Something in there. Or perhaps, go the first ten days of the month
with it in, the second ten days backwards, and the last ten days normal
again. You could gradually reduce your bill at first and over a period of
time work the bill down to an amount you feel is justified.
If by chance you happen to have a digital meter, pulling it out will
not cause it to blink or some such thing when you put it back in, so the
above step can be applied to digital meters as well.
STEP2:
Now to put back your meter. Use a soldering iron to warm the end of
the wire. Now stick it back in the lead, right next to the place where you
cut it. Don't stick the wire in very far, just a tiny bit. If you are
putting the meter in upside down for the 2nd set of 10 days in the month,
put the glass on, but don't bother to reconnect the wire until you are
through messing with the meter for that month. Be sure to dirty up the
lead and wire when you are through. If its too clean, they get suspicious.
You can determine when PG&E will be at your house by looking on your
bill. If you are still unsure when they will be around to look at your
meter, you can ask them. Tell them you were jipped on your bill or you
want to find out how to count the meter and ask when the meterperson comes
out. You could even give a neighbor's address if you wanted.
IF CAUGHT:
If you are caught, they will replace your meter with a digital one.
They won't send you to jail (although it is a misdemenour, not a felony).
They will just change you over to digital. They won't embarrass you or
get you in trouble.
You won't be able to simply turn back the dial if you want to try
this instead of actually leaving the meter out for a while or running it
backwards. You may be able to turn the meter back when it is disengaged
though. Move one in the hundreds back one number if you are able to.
Some people have placed strong magnets on the glass to reduce their bill.
If you live in an apartment, the above methods for bill reducing still
apply but you must be sure neighbors and the apartment manager don't spot
you.
The authors of this file don't cheat PG&E and never intend to, but
our friend Ernie Lundquist has and is, once again, responsible for suppling
us with scandalous information.
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* Call the Jesters Realm - (415) 829-1555 Home of the Interstellar Times *
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* The Interstellar Times - Volume X *
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